The Thief of Bagdad (1924)

Country: USA

Released: March 18th, 1924

Genre: Adventure, Fantasy

Directed by: Raoul Walsh

Produced by: Douglas Fairbanks

Written by: Achmed Abdullah

I've recently gotten some constructive criticism regarding the blog lately, specifically that I use too many swears and that they distract from the writing rather than enhance it. Thus, in order to appease the half a dozen readers I have, I will be forgoing any offensive language for the duration of this review. So without further a due, let's start this frickin' thing.

The Thief of Bagdad is cliche. It's so gosh darned cliche you'd think the director spent his whole doggone time writing the screenplay browsing frazzle-wrackin' TVTropes or something. Every line, every scene, every mother hubbing plot beat feels like it was lifted out of another film. By all accounts I should have hated this movie so gosh darn diddly much.

But I didn't hate it.

In fact, I actually really liked it.

The plot of The Thief of Bagdad is not all that hard to follow. Have you seen Disney's Aladin? Good, then you're pretty much up to speed. The film stars Douglas Fairbanks as Ahmed, a no good ruffian, or 'thief' if you will, who does what he want's with very little care for others. He falls in love with the local Princess (Julanne Johnston) who is going to get married soon and is visited by a bunch of not-very-nice suitors, including an overtly evil one (Sojin Kamiyama); because hey, this is a fantasy and there has to be the overtly evil one. Ahmed, who becomes infatuated with the lovely lady, disguises himself as a suitor and sneaks into the palace to win her affection. The two fall in love but Ahmed, after becoming wracked with guilt at deceiving his love, is exposed as a fraud and is ordered to be executed. He escapes and  the Princess, terrified about marrying one of the other suitors, announces that she will marry whoever brings her the rarest gift in the world in a bid to delay the marriage. Ahmed, hearing of this, goes on an arduous quest to the ends of the Earth to a suitable gift while the other suitors either buy or cheat their way towards there's. Once they return the Princess still refuses to chose a husband and the evil guy (yes he has a name, but really who cares?) gets impatient, taking the city by force with his army. The film ends with Ahmed using his magical artifact to raise a ghost army to drive evil guy away, saving the day. He and the Princess get married and the two lived happily ever after, the end.

So as you can see this is a pretty common story told in countless films like Aladin, The Thief and the Cobbler, the uh... 1940s remake of The Thief of Bagdad. It's a timeless tale and a cornerstone of the  collection of literature that makes up "One Thousand and One Arabian Nights," it just so happens that The Thief of Bagdad was the first to do it in movie format. 

Every trope in this movie is a cliche: you've got the scrappy underdog with the heart of gold, a damsel in distress, love at first sight (sort of), a quest full of trials, a wise hermit, the big bad guy, even a monkey! Although that one is less cute than it is terrifying as shazbot. Yet despite all these cliches I was completely invested in the story, perhaps because they're presented so earnestly that you can't help but get sucked into the world. It's a movie that feels very "old hollywood," using big exotic-looking sets as the backdrop for an epic adventure staring two star-crossed lovers, and I guess fundamentally that's why it works so smegging well. it's not trying to tell a deep or complex story, it's just trying to have fun with a goofy adventure. Because of this I was completely invested in the tale of Ahmed and his quest to win the heart of is beloved. It's a fairytale in the purest sense, a swashbuckling story reminiscent of the adventure serials of the 1950s that would go on to influence films like Star Wars or Indiana Jones. Heck, this is probably where the trend began. You can certainly sense the parallels between Thief and these more contemporary movies. 

It's also a movie who's length I really didn't feel, a rarity on this list. Every element works so well because it's such a tight, well told story. Every scene serves a purpose, every beat helps move the plot forward. Nothing feels needless or superficial, it all coalesces into an effective narrative. An early scene where Ahmed crashes into a Mosque and ridicules the kindly imam there is important later on when that same imam offers him penance and points him in the direction of the magical treasure. Watching each suitor get their rare gifts is important because it serves as a contrast to Ahmed's struggle and because each gift becomes instrumental in resolving the climax. Spending the first twenty minutes of the movie watching Ahmed rob people is important because is helps establish what kind of character he is and makes it all the more rewarding when we see him grow into maturity. All these scenes have their place in the plot and are aided by fantastic performances across the board, especially Douglas Fairbanks who is incredibly watchable as Ahmed. Cheese and crackers the guy is charismatic. For those of you who don't know Fairbanks was one of THE stars of his day. He was the original Robin Hood, the original Zorro, and he helped found the Oscars. I mean gee whiz the guy's official title for years of the "King of Hollywood." Dagnabbit, just look at the gosh darned guy!

I would fuck that man in a heart-beat.

I-I mean I would...uh... make love to that man in a heart-beat.

Aside from Faribanks though the real star of the movie is the set. Everything feels so grand and whimsical. Camels roam the giant bazaars while actors dressed in elaborate garbs hawk their wares. Guards patrol the lavish streets brandishing giant, exotic swords as the spires of Baghdad rise over the city, casting a shadow over the main gate (which by the way is one of the coolest designed I've ever seen, opening in five parts with giant, intimidating teeth like the maw of a great beast). It helps make everything feel like a fantasy and transports us to the world. Things get especially cool when Ahmed fights monsters on his quest, the first of which looks especially good, like something Ray Harryhausen could have made.

As with most things though the film isn't perfect. The bad guy is a Mongolian prince, and despite having most of the roles played by Asian actors there's still a real "yellow peril" vibe throughout the movie with every single Asian character being evil. The historical inaccuracies are also fairly annoying although those are more forgivable considering it's supposed to be a fantasy rather than historical fiction. One quick side note though: to all film directors or writers, that long Chinese ponytail that you see in old photographs of nineteenth century Chinese men? You know, these? That's called a queue. It is not Chinese but rather Manchurian, and it was not introduced to China until the Qing dynasty was established in the mid-seventeenth century. Please stop using it when portraying Ancient China, you look like lazy jerks. Also while I praised some of the effects in the previous paragraph a few of them look pretty cheap looking, particularly the last two monster fights (which look like stuffed animals) and when Ahmed is flying a horse with wings taped to his side. Whoops sorry, I mean when he's riding "pegasus." The flogging scene where Ahmed is discovered as a fake and punished was also less brutal than it could have or should have been, but I guess this is supposed to be a family movie. Besides most of these are really just nitpicks, at the end of the day the good vastly outweighs the flaws in The Thief of Baghdad, and for all it's cheese and cliches I still had a ton of fun watching it.